Humility

My days right now are much the same but no two are ever alike. Kinda like snowflakes.

This morning my sweet Lily was nursing and heading off to sleep for her morning nap and she refused to let go of me. Normally she falls off to sleep nursing and her daddy scoops her up and has his daddy daughter morning nap but today she wanted me, and it is my great pleasure that I have a life that allows us to just go with it. Her daddy went off to do my morning chores and I stayed in bed snuggled up with our girl.

We traded out and shared time throughout the whole day, depending on what we were doing and whether Lily could participate with our activities. At one point today, her naps having got off track after a visit with Gramma on Skype, I thought she was tired and when she started showing me her sign for ‘Potty” I kept telling her she was tired and to just sleep. She was right and I was wrong and although I listened at the last minute and got her to the potty, and she rewarded me with a huge toothless grin, I wondered, “Why don’t I trust her?” She does sign for potty sometimes when she does not need it but she will be needing something else and never has she signed for potty when she is tired. She does not have other signs yet, but she is learning and if you ask is she is hungry “Do you want a boob?” (That’s a story for another day) you get a huge smile if she is hungry. So why am I already not trusting her? It is something that is very important to me, to her father and I, to trust her. So she can trust herself, we don’t want to fall into the ‘because I said so’ parenting. It does not mean we will not offer direction and enforce it if her safety it at stake but for the other stuff we want her to lead the way. Like the fact that she wants to use the potty, her choice and so it should be her choice when she gets to sit on it!

Thankfully she is not into holding a grudge, but right now she is very tired so I am going to go and hold my little girl, nurse her and fall asleep. After all that is why we live like we do, so at any moment we can stop and do what our hearts want most, and right now my heart wants to be with my daughter most.

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